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It’s been a hell of a day here in the Digital Media Consulting world. If your day was half as crazy as mine, take a minute to laugh and learn from my friend Babette’s guest post on sales snafu’s we all make from time to time.

(inspired by the lyrics to “50 Ways To Leave Your Lover” by Paul Simon)

1.       You didn’t call me back, Zack

2.       You promised stuff I don’t need, Steve

3.       Yet another incorrect invoice, Royce?

4.       You’re an email pest, Les

5.       You’re always late, Nate

6.       You look like a mess, Bess

7.       No attention to details, Gail

8.       You sell and disappear, Dear

9.       No follow-up, Buttercup

10.    You show up once a year, to renew, Drew

11.    We call you “no accountability ,Tillie”

12.    You’re always passing the blame, Dane

13.    Why you always covering your —, Cass

14.    You sound like a talking head, Fred

15.    You sound too techie, Becky

16.    You sound too salesy, Casey

17.    You don’t know your stuff, Muff (yes, Muffy)

18.    Your product lacks quality, Molly

19.    Your solution failed, Yale

20.    Bait and switch time, again, Len?

21.    Same old status-quo, Beau

22.    I love to tell you No, Moe

23.    Product’s not a good fit, you nitwit

24.    You’re not in my shoes, Lou

25.    Your babbling hurts my head, Ned

26.    Stop calling my phone, Tyrone

27.    Doesn’t offer value to me, Dee

28.    You don’t listen to me, Sandy

29.    You talk too much, Butch

30.    It’s always about you, Sue

31.    You’re not too trusty, Rusty

32.    You think too small, Shawn

33.    You have no soft skills, Bill

34.    You sound like a robot, Todd

35.    You make me squirm, Sherm

36.    No meaningful point of difference, Vince

37.    You never adapt to my plan, Stan

38.    You never focus, Gus

39.    You don’t understand my business, Tess

40.    I’m really not in pain, Zane

41.    You want another RFP, really, Seeley?

42.    Your deals always go sour, Igor

43.    Always got to have your way, Ray

44.    You’re not too smart, Art

45.    You can’t take us to the next level, Pavel

46.    You rant on and on, Brandon

47.    Your company has a bad rap, Chap

48.    Your competitor got here first, Dirk

49.    You keep changing your story, Maury

50.    I’m too busy for you, Lizzie

For the more great sales tips from Babette Ten Haken visit her Sales Aerobics for Engineers Blog